Maintaining Equilibrium

I was out of sorts a couple of days ago, overly sensitive, not sleeping, all twisted up in my back and neck, just well, out of sorts. I was talking with a friend about it when I realized, it was mostly me being upset by the state of the world, and taking the weight of it on myself. Duh! Poor Susan for not being omnipotent.

Sharon Astyk has written of being afraid, and one of the questions on Crunchy Chicken for David Wann was whether or not he ever gets downcast or afraid. I think it is an occupational hazard for people who are trying to make change, and change doesn't come fast enough.

My friend is in a profession where practitioners burn out in an average of six years. He has been in it for 27 years and is going strong. He said that he was burning out six years into it, but he learned how to do what he can and let the rest go. He does his level best, and then he lays the burden down, and prays, and takes care of himself physically, and spends time with his family.

That is an excellent example. This stuff can weigh on a person, and even smiley Susie Sunshine has a hard time being sunny sometimes. I decided that I need to look to my tradition, write in my journal, and read Catholic activists such as Dorothy Day, Philip and Daniel Berrigan, Sr. Helen Prejean, and all the rest. They are an interesting lot that can help ground me in my tradition while helping to fan the flames.

The diaries of Dorothy Day are to be published this month. She was a salty, earthy activist who earned her chops among the radicals of the teens and twenties. She converted to Catholicism to the bewilderment of her friends and family, and lost the father of her daughter, who would have nothing to do with religion or marriage. With Peter Maurin, she founded the Catholic Worker movement, established to further the cause of the poor and oppressed. At 75 she was arrested on the picket line with the United Farm Workers. After her death, her case was put forward for canonization, and she is now formally acknowledged as a "Servant of God". Some among her acquaintance say she would hate being canonized, as it might lead the rest of us to think she was somehow set apart and thus that we are off the hook. Right.

I need to follow my friend's example and advice, know what I can do and what I can't, and let the rest go. I spent my three day weekend (Spring Break) mostly walking around, riding my bike on errands, running, seeing friends and cooking. It was just what the doctor ordered. Now I yearn for a nice weekend silent retreat some place with a good garden and a bunch of books about making some noise for the greater good.

Photo:
http://www.nndb.com/people/495/000048351/